How to Choose the Song for Your First Dance

Depending on the couple, choosing that special song that will play during your first dance as a couple can either be very easy or extremely stressful. Once you begin to realize how many options there are and how this one song is supposed to musically represent the two of you as a couple, pressure can begin to rise.

Maybe you’re a couple who are dreading the first dance. Or maybe you can’t wait for the chance to perform a specially choreographed routine. Or if you’re really unlucky, one of you is dreading it and one wants to put on a show! No matter where you find yourselves as your special day approaches, we have answers for you.

To start the selection process talk about what kind of mood you want to set. Are you having a very traditional wedding or are you more of the rebel type? Are you a couple who are constantly laughing and joking around? Or are you shyer and reserved? Your first dance song should reflect your style and taste. Once you know the mood you want to set figure out if there’s already a song that has special meaning for you. Think the first kiss, first “I love you”, or consider bands or concerts you’ve attended. Chances are one of those songs will fit the bill just perfectly.

After you’ve narrowed your list down to 3 or 4 songs, consider the tempo, the lyrics and the length of the song. Some songs just move too fast for a first dance feel and others last way too long. Still, other songs that have a beautiful melody have lyrics that don’t work for a wedding. This might be a good time to have a talk with your DJ. As a professional, they have worked at hundreds if not thousands of weddings and have seen everything. They can listen to your ideas and concerns and make recommendations that will work for both of you.

If you decide to do a choreographed dance you should get started 4-6 months in advance. That way, by the time the wedding day arrives, you will feel comfortable about the choreography and can focus on your partner and enjoy this special moment together.

If you’re nervous about your dancing skills don’t worry. If you can walk, you can dance. Try dancing with your partner at home until you feel comfortable together. Leave out the fancy moves and just enjoy being close.

Whatever you decide, keep in mind that the dance and the entire day goes by quickly. Before you know it you’ll be heading off to begin life as a newly married couple. Hopefully, your first dance will be the beginning of many special moments you will share on the dance floor.



How to Make the Perfect Wedding Toast

Sometimes in life, and especially at weddings, you’re called upon to do something you’d rather not do. Giving a wedding toast may be one of those things for you. But no need to worry. Follow these simple tips, be prepared, and you’ll do just fine.

The first thing to remember is that a large range of ages and relationships will be represented at the reception. Many of them don’t know each other and some of them may not know you either. So be sure to have your wedding DJ announce you and tell the crowd your name and how you are related to the couple.

Once you’ve been introduced, greet the crowd and make eye contact. You may want to briefly recognize any really special guests like the bride’s 87 year old Grandma, the groom’s Cousin Julie who flew in from China, and so on. Keep this brief though because the focus of your toast is the happy couple.

Whether you are the maid of honor or the best man or someone else who’s been asked to give a toast, keep things light, heartfelt and appropriate to the event. This isn’t a bachelor or bachelorette party. This is not the time to bring up past misdeeds, former girlfriends or boyfriends, or make rude jokes at someone else’s expense. Also, don’t share inside jokes that only a few of the guests will understand. This makes people feel left out.

So what should you say? I’ve created the following outline you can use to plan and practice your speech in advance.

  1. Say your name again, how you know the couple and how happy you are to be here on this special day with family and friends. Now is a good time to recognize those really special guests if there are any in attendance.
  2. Direct your attention to the couple as you speak. It’s entirely acceptable to have a copy of your speech to refer to as you go. But don’t let your eyes stay there. Keep making eye contact with the couple.
  3. Now is the time to get personal. Think about how you know the groom or bride. Since grade school, as a co-worker, or in a softball league? Share something that is remarkable about the person that drew you in right away. If you can, share a memory of when the two met. Then share some nice remarks about their spouse. If you don’t know any, be creative. Even a disagreeable trait can have a positive aspect if you think about it.
  4. Finish your toast by adding a congratulatory statement and raising your glass to the couple. Need inspiration? You can check out this site for some sample endings.
  5. Be brief! There will probably be others toasting and everybody is ready to celebrate. Three to five minutes is perfect.
  6. One last thing…practice before the reception. Even just reading aloud from your notes a few times will make a big difference and help you feel more at ease when it’s time to toast.

Remember, you’ve been asked to give a toast because you are a special person in the couple’s life. Be sincere and enjoy the moment.